Yesterday, Liz Bevarly posed an interesting question on her blog about whether or not romance novels are unrealistic because they always have a happy ending. The comments got quite philosophical and got me to thinking.
Do we, as human beings require love to live happy, fulfilled lives?
In my opinion, yes, we, as human beings absolutely require some sort of bond, some sort of connection with another living thing to be happy.
Now, I'm not talking about just romantic or sexual love, but any kind of love, whether it's filial, the love of friends, or even the love one has for a pet.
In my life I've known quite a few people who have, for one reason or another, remained single throughout their lives and been happy and fulfilled. But they have friends, family and often pets to fill the empty place in their hearts that a mate would normally fill.
I've also known single people who are miserable examples of the human species. Not surprisingly, they've either shunned the love offered them in the past or they've gone out of their way to avoid any close relationships with other human beings. Now, they're like an old, barnacle-encrusted shipwreck. You see the shell on the outside, but inside, they're nothing but an empty vessel.
Another question that popped up into my brain was; Can the memory of a great love in one's past sustain a person for the rest of their life?
Occasionally my friends and I will talk about what we would do if we found ourselves suddenly single, either thru divorce or the death of our spouses. My automatic response is to laugh and say that I'd remain single for the rest of my life--it's too much trouble to *house break* another man. But in my heart of hearts, I wonder if that would really be the case. Would I stay single for the rest of my life, preferring the memories of my life with Hubby? Or would I eventually feel the need to seek out another special someone to keep the other side of the bed warm on a cold night and someone whose razor I can steal because it works so much better than mine?
So, what do you think? Do we need love to be happy, fulfilled people? Or can we get along just fine without it?
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5 comments:
I'm single. Have been for most of my life and expect to be so for the rest of it.
I can't say I have many close friends nor am I especially close to my family.
I do pretty well for myself.
Love just isn't in the cards for some people.
As a Christian, I believe that we won't be fulfilled completely without love for God. So, yes, love is absolutely a necessity for ALL human life.
I think humans are designed to love. To receive love and to give love. I do not think it is possible to go through life without any type of love in it and be happy.
Wow, two very different opinions on this. :)
So, Rob, even though you say you don't have "many" close friends, you do have some, yes? And you write about relationships (of one degree or another).And even though you're not involved in a romantic relationship, you DO have significant people in your life, right?
So, I would say you have love in your life. :)
Twolilhahas, I agree that we humans are "designed" to love. It's a beautiful sentiment. Whether it's loving a dog or your spouse, or the lonely oldster who lives next door, I think it's built into our DNA to give and receive love on some level, however small.
However, I do draw the line at loving spiders and any member of the primate species that isn't homo sapien.
I think everyone needs love, I think you need to like who you are and content with whatever state you find yourself in- single, married or whatever. No one person can fulfill all of the others needs. Reaching out to other definately enhances ones life. Cultivating what is inside as well as outside helps too. We each have to be willing to give 110%. I love my husband but if I found myself single- I would not marry again. I grew up in a time through that it was said to women they weren't complete if they weren't married. I tell my children, it is ok to be single if that is what God has for you, and it is miserable married to wrong person.
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